There is a Russian word that is very important for any man dating a Russian bride to understand: gostinets. This is the word for gifts given by visitors and it is an essential part of the Russian culture. Russians are a very warm, friendly type of people and they willingly shower their guests with food, drink, and often gifts. Whether you want to send a token of your affection before things get serious enough for a face-to-face meeting or you are getting ready to visit Russia with the hope to marry a Russian woman, you should plan appropriate gifts not only for her, but for the entire family.

If you are sending gifts through the mail make sure not to send cash. While you may assume it would be appreciated and it takes the guess work out of picking out gifts that she will really love, it also feeds into the problem of Russian bride scams who look for men who will be willing to send cash. It is safer to go with actual gifts, and your future bride will appreciate the effort and time taken to pick them out as well.

While flowers may seem like an obvious pick for the first time you visit their country to marry Russian women, there are some common mistakes that can be made with this idea. Russian women often associate different messages with certain colors of flowers. While red roses will send a message of love and real affection, yellow flowers of any sort are often associated with infidelity. Going with red roses or a bouquet of roses and lilies is a smart choice, but make sure it includes an uneven number of flowers total. Even numbers are taken to funerals and may be seen as inappropriate for the meeting of your bride.

While most men do not know these things when they go to marry Russian women, you can make a great first impression by showing in these subtle ways that you have taken an interest in your bride’s culture.

Flowers are a great start, but you will want to have something else for your bride to show that you are in fact very serious with intentions to marry a Russian woman. Since Russian girls are very concerned with physical appearances, they also enjoy high quality perfumes and other beauty products. You can often pick these up at duty free shops during your travels to Russia.

When it comes to other family members, it is a good idea to bring gifts that represent your home country. You want to share something of your own world with them, and the options are endless. If you know a little something about her parents and other members of the family, then you can buy gifts that correspond with their interests. For example, a brother that is into sports may enjoy something related to his favorite sports from your country.

For female members of the family such as her mother or sisters, you could bring small pieces of jewelry such as rings or anklets. They may also enjoy perfume and beauty products, but make sure you do not give them the same thing you bring your bride. Whatever decisions you make, you want to make sure that your love knows she is special and you put extra thought into picking her gifts.

While picking the gifts that show you have serious intentions to marry a Russian woman is important, it is also important how you hand them out. It is not necessary to walk in the door with them ready in hand. If you are planning to announce an engagement or marriage plans, then that would be a good time to pass around the gifts, since the family will all be assembled for the announcement.

The aim of marriage counselling should be to help couple move towards a conscious marriage. A definition of this would be a marriage that allows the opportunity for maximum psychological and spiritual growth by becoming conscious of and cooperating with the basic goals of the unconscious mind: to be safe, to be healed and to be whole.

1. The hidden purpose of marriage is to heal childhood wounds.

This involves helping individuals recognize their unresolved childhood issues and how these issues underlie their current behaviour and emotions. This will help people to transcend their surface needs and desires and provide them with great insight into their everyday interactions.

2. Creating a more accurate image of a persons’ partner.

People tend to fuse their lover with their primary caretaker and then project their own negative traits onto their partner. In a conscious marriage these illusions gradually become shattered and one begins to see their partner as they really are; another wounded person struggling to be healed.

3. A person takes responsibility for communicating their needs and desires to their partner.

In an unconscious marriage a person expects their partner to intuitively meet their needs. A conscious marriage involves the understanding that needs require clear communication.

4. Your interactions become more intentional.

A conscious marriage entails behaving in a more constructive manner as opposed to merely reacting without thinking.

5. An individual values their partners’ needs as much as their own.

More energy is devoted to looking after ones’ partner instead of mistakenly assuming that the role of the partner is to look after ones’ every wish and desire.

6. A person embraces their negative traits.

The individual openly acknowledges the fact that they have a dark side to their personality, just like everyone else. By accepting this, a person is less likely to project these negative traits onto their partner, which serves to create a more pleasant environment.

7. New methods are learned to satisfy ones’ basic needs and desires.

When couples are locked in a power struggle, the partners tend to use negative tactics in an attempt to coerce the other to meet their needs. In a conscious marriage this can be transcended and a realization develops that the partner can help one meet their needs but only when more constructive and cooperative tactics are employed.

8. A person will learn to look inwards for the strengths and abilities they are lacking.

Partners are chosen because an individual can see in them all the abilities and strengths that they do not have. This then leads to an illusory sense of wholeness. However, in a conscious marriage a person learns that wholeness results from finding these positive traits within themselves.

9. An awareness develops of the motivation to become loving, whole and at one with the universe.

Everyone has the God-given ability to love unconditionally and experience the unity of nature and the world. However, due to imperfect parenting and social conditioning these qualities are almost all but forgotten. A conscious marriage provides the opportunity to rediscover these qualities and experience ones’ original nature.

10. The fact that creating a conscious marriage is difficult is accepted.

Typically, in an unconscious marriage, a person feels that a successful relationship involves being with the right person. In a conscious marriage, a person comes to the realization that they are with the right partner. Further, an understanding begins to develop that a good marriage requires constant hard work, courage and commitment.

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